Monday, December 5, 2011

Drop Dead Diva Project...

This project was born from my breakthrough in a previous post Beliefs and in conjunction with the love of one of my FAVORITE TV shows, Lifetime’s Drop Dead Diva (click here for show website). This  show tells the story of a shallow wannabe model (Deb) who dies in a sudden accident only to find her soul resurfacing in the body of a brilliant, plus-size and recently deceased attorney, Jane.  Outraged by her sudden demise, she attempts to persuade Fred to return her to her shallow existence but is accidentally relegated to the body of the recently deceased Jane Bingum (Brooke Elliott). An intelligent, thoughtful and plus-size attorney with a loyal assistant, Teri (Margaret Cho), Jane has always lived in the shadow of her colleagues, whereas Deb has always relied on her external beauty. By a twist of fate and a bolt of divine intervention, Deb must come to terms with inhabiting Jane’s curvier frame and learn to reconcile her beauty-queen ways with her brilliant new mind.   (about the show). The grace, strength, poise and courage that the character, Jane/Deb, faces the world with each day is inspiring and the belief she has in herself is unbreakable. This is what I want every woman, including myself, to feel each and every day.

To be a “Drop Dead Diva” you must have the desire and will to love yourself no matter what and to take your inner Diva that lives inside all of us and let her out. I call mine my “Blooming Diva”, she’s been looking to get out for quite some time and so out she shall come.  I was told once, or read somewhere, that your outside physical appearance doesn’t always match how you feel on the inside once you remove all the worries, insecurities and concerns about what people think. This year that is what I have done, gone to work on removing all those inner insecurities, worries and concerns about what people think about me. So my inner diva is looking to bloom and turn my outer appearance into the beautiful butterfly that I am on the inside. Now, before ya’ll go and get in an uproar, I am in no way saying that I’m not already a pretty lil butterfly, I am talking about a healthy, fit butterfly. I’ve been sharing this with some of my friends and they’ve jumped down my throat about me already being a beautiful butterfly, so I’m just clarifying! Wow, that is a whole lot of butterfly talk in one paragraph!

As of last Friday I’ve signed on with a very dear friend, Karyn, to be part of a 90 day challenge. I’m giving myself 90 days to prove to myself that I have what it takes to let out my “Blooming Diva”. Let’s call it the 

Drop Dead Diva Project 90 Day Kick Off Party!!!

This party kicks off Tuesday, Wednesday at the latest, as there are a couple peeps that have joined this challenge.  What I want out of the next 90 days? I am out to prove to myself that I CAN DO THIS. I have a nasty habit of not believing in myself that I am out to destroy and I’m using the next 90 days and the support of my friends and family to do this.

My invitation: Come along on the next 90 days. Take one area of your life that you have not been letting your inner Diva out to play. Plot the actions, take the steps and let the b*tch out! 

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Update!

Well it is officially the first day of the last month of the 2011. I can’t help but be a little reflective, a little disappointed, yet at the same time optimistic and looking forward to the next month and 2012.

The disappointment comes from not really having accomplished much on my list of goals that I set out for this year, but the optimism comes from all the changes that I have had and continue to have these last 11 months. I’ve had a couple friends say to me recently that I’m not the same person I was at the start of the year, that I have a “glow” about me and a smile frequents my face a majority of the day. Now don’t go over analyzing the “glow” comment, I’m not pregnant and I ain’t using any miracle creams I promise ;) I believe that the glow comes from a level of genuine happiness that seems to have crept into my life.  I’m more confident in certain areas of my life and feel like I’m genuinely blessed to have all that I have. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am dead smack in the middle of one of the most uncomfortable times in my life. All my old ways of dealing with situations and things are going bankrupt and I haven’t quite navigated the waters of confidence and power, but I’m getting there.

I don’t know where I would be at in this journey this year if it wasn’t for my friends and family. Although there have been a lot of changes I’m grateful for each and every one of them.  I’m also grateful for the new friends and potential family members that have come into my life this year, and the great things that I will learn from them and them from me.

I was pretty stuck in my ways at the beginning of the year and although I didn’t accomplish all that I wanted, I’m happy about what I have accomplished and how I have grown. Normally I would be beating myself with a mental bat for not accomplishing what I outlined, but right now I see the gaps of why some of them didn’t happen and the structures I’m putting in to support the success of those goals next year.

Don’t worry, Drop Dead Diva Project post is coming! I know I said it would be the next post, but I couldn’t help but post this first J